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How to Apologize

In 2020 let’s all resolve to take ownership for our actions. Everything from what we do, to the words we say.

We can demonstrate ownership in all facets of our lives: relationships with our loved ones, professional relationships, and anybody in our community.


Taking ownership is another way of standing tall in the world. A way of claiming our space. Of being authentic and real.

The second we attempt to pass the buck, we are handing over our power. 😔

The most effective way we can demonstrate ownership for our actions is learning how to apologize effectively. We each make hundreds of mistakes a day. But how often do we take the time to own up to them? To clean up our messes. To learn from them. And grow. 🔥🔥🔥

Here’s what to do when making an apology:

Express your sorrow: "I’m sorry for..."

Own your guilt: "I was wrong when I..."

Name your specific wrongs: "I did x, y, and z…"

Articulate the impact of your actions: "I know that I hurt you when I...and it sounds like the consequences were..."

Make amends: "What can I do to make this right?" (and then do it)

Here’s what NOT to do when making an apology: Don’t use “if statements”: "Sorry if I…" Don’t try to shift the blame or defend yourself: "I know I did x,y, and z, but you…" Don’t use the passive voice: "I'm sorry you were offended…" This process can seem time-consuming, cumbersome, and uncomfortable at first. But it’s a practice, not a talent. It can be learned, honed, and improved. 😍 And even more importantly, the results will speak for themselves. I think you will find when you take the time to thoroughly and vulnerable own you actions, you will garner more trust from your loved ones, co-workers, and pretty much everyone in your social orbit.

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